The Beauty of Music

This video of Pearl Jam is from a very large music and arts festival called Bonnaroo.

By far, this is one of the most memorable moments of my life. Some 80,000 people jammed shoulder to shoulder into a field to witness the brilliance of Pearl Jam.

The lighters that audience members held while swaying back and forth to the music created enough light to make faces visible. Looking to my left and right, I couldn't see an end to the crowd that sang as audibly as lead singer Eddie Vedder himself.

I imagined I was in the place of the band. What an overwhelming experience. Even though they are extremely popular and play for crowds as large as this, can you ever get over that feeling? The song­—your words, your creation—is being sung to you by thousands of people for one simple reason; they love it.

We all shared a moment that night without even realizing it. All 80,000 of us experienced a perfect example of the beauty of music.

Misery Loves Company

I spent over twenty four sleepless hours trying to describe the emotional effect this song has on me. The song is eerie and haunting. So of course, I wanted to write a blog that seemed fitting. I thought it would be simple because I feel a connection to the song. However, it's been very difficult. Emotionally, I'm drained. The song has deeper meaning than I previously thought.

I was certain that I felt sadness when I listened to this song, but I was wrong. Truth is, I'm wrong about how I feel most of the time. The song makes me remember home. Growing up, the small town always felt like an ideal place to live. I used to imagine living there forever. To me, it was a place where nothing bad ever happened. I felt safe. Boy, was I naive.

So much misery exists in the town that it's hard to feel true happiness. I've come to realize that miserable people will only make other feel the same. I used to think something was wrong with me. I couldn't understand why others were constantly hurting me. It's taken some time and plenty of mistakes to finally realize that it's not me. It's them. I needed to get away and I did. For that, I'm proud.

Listening to "Mad World," I feel a huge sense of relief. I'm not in that dark place anymore. It reminds me that I have more strength than I give myself credit for. I don't live in that world anymore, and I don't surround myself with miserable people. Although I've felt the feelings described in the song, I don't anymore.

I'm not dying in my dreams. I'm living.

Music is Me

Music fascinates me. It always has.

For a brief amount of time, I majored in elementary education. A course requirement of Education 200 is to observe a special needs class. I challenged myself and chose to observe the severe and profound. Many of the kids I worked with were nonverbal, while others couldn’t recall their names. I remember one nonverbal student in particular who was always crying, yet I couldn’t tell if it was from anger, sadness or just frustration. I felt empathy for him as I did for all of the students. I couldn’t imagine the frustration of not being able to communicate your wants and needs with others. The thought nagged at me until I discovered their outlet…music.

Each Friday, the music teacher came to them bringing a CD player along with a collection of familiar CD’s for the students. Standing in front of the room, she sang along with the music. So did they. This was a profound moment for me. I’ve always loved music, but this is the first time I realized just how big it really is. Students who couldn’t recall their own name remembered the words to their favorite songs. The nonverbal students bound to wheelchairs laughed loudly, moving their heads back and forth along with the music. The crying student stopped crying.

Music is big. It’s universal. Music inspires, influences and empowers. It evokes emotion as much as it allows us to express emotion. Music remembers. It’s by our side, guaranteed to never leave us. Music is home. Music is us, and most importantly music is me.

So if you haven’t figured it out yet, music is the foundation of my blog. The idea of my blog is to post a song and relate it to life, sometimes my own, sometimes my observations of others. However, I’m not going to limit myself to this. Depending on my mood, I might do something completely different. I can, however, promise that music will always be the basis.